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Training Children by Example
Scripture Reading: Deuteronomy 6
The goal of training children is to bring them to a level of maturity whereby they might be able to make responsible decisions on their own, resulting in responsible actions that reflect the right values and attitudes of the parents.
What does it mean to “train”?
Webster’s defines training as “guiding the growth of; guiding the mental, moral, etc., development of; to bring up; to rear; to discipline or condition; to prepare to make fit.”
Ephesians 6:4 say's parents are to “bring (children) up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.” The phase “bring…up…” means to “rear up to maturity; to cherish or train” God wants us to bring our children to the place of maturity through daily training! (Deuteronomy 6:7).
Why is it necessary for parents to train their children?
¨ Children are sinners. It is very important for parents to “train” them to discern between right and wrong and to prepare them for the new birth experience (Psalm 51:5).
¨ Children are ignorant. The principles and concepts imparted to them from the youngest age will make up their understanding and frame of reference (Proverbs 19:2).
¨ Children are vulnerable. They need to be trained to beware of the dangers of life (Matthew 10:16; 18:6).
¨ Children are potentiality. A well-trained, disciplined person can achieve great success in life. God has a purpose and a plan for your children that can only be fully realized as you cooperate in training them.
¨ Children are transmitters. The Christian faith and lifestyle is passed down through the generators as parents train their children in the ways of the Lord (Psalm 78:4-8; Psalm 145:4).
How do parents train their children in the ways of the Lord?
The passage from Deuteronomy, chapter 6 (verses 5-7) gives us clear insight into the methods of training our children.
Ø “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God”. Parents themselves must have a demonstrated love for God in every area of their personal life.
Ø “heart”
Ø “soul”
Ø “might”
Ø “These words shall be in thine heart”. God’s principles must be a part of every parent’s life. A father and a mother must know God’s Word personally and be able to share it. This necessitates attending church, receiving teaching, reading, and studying the scriptures and applying God’s principles daily.
ü “Thou shalt teach (these words) diligently unto thy children”. It is a divinely established responsibility of parents to constantly give positive scriptural input into the hearts and minds of their children. Parents are to verbalize God’s words continually:
ü “When thou sittest in thine house” includes family time and times of relaxation.
ü “When thou walkest by the way” includes times of transportation or walking.
ü “When thou liest down” means at bedtime.
ü “When thou risest up”, means in the morning.
It is obvious in this passage that the predominant means for training up children in the ways of the Lord is in the lifestyle of the parents.
We can only train our children to be what we ourselves already are. “Like begets like”. We are compelled to examine closely our lifestyle and consider whether or not we are properly serving our children as adult models of the Christian way of life (1 Corinthians 4:16; 11:1; 1 Timothy 4:16; 2 Timothy 3:10; 11, 14).
In what are parents to train their children?
The training of children relates to every part of life. Listed below are some primary areas in which proper training is essential for success in life.
Values:
q Is the way I’m handling my money teaching my children Biblical values?
q Is the way I’m using my time, training my children to put God first?
Attitudes:
q Is my attitude towards authority teaching my children to respond whole-heartedly to God’s delegated authority?
q Does my outlook on life inspire positive attitudes in my children?
q Does my attitude of meekness teach my children to yield their rights to God?
q Do I demonstrate the kind of love that teaches my children to love as God does?
Right Words:
q Does my daily language consistently teach my children to communicate in an edifying manner?
q Do my words of commendation encourage and motivate my children to more good works?
Behavior and Godly Habits:
q Does my behavior teach my children something different than my words?
q Are my children learning self-control by my balanced lifestyle?
Friends:
q Does my circle of friends teach my children how to choose and develop proper friendships?
q Am I reaching out to others and thereby teaching my children to enlarge their circle of friends?
Wisdom:
q Am I teaching my children wisdom and good judgment by making daily decisions based on the principles of God?
q Does my response to my failures teach my children how to learn from their own?
q Do I relate God’s Word to experiences and circumstances in daily situations in my home?
Physical Health:
q Does my general physical condition motivate my children to keep themselves in good health?
It is vital that parents examine each of these areas in their own personal lives and evaluate whether or not their lifestyle would be desirable to be passed on to their children.
Remember we’re striving to be like Him and that’s our goal—do your best!
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