|
Real Submission
Scripture Reading: Ephesians 5: 22-23; 1 Peter 3; Hebrews 13:17
What is submission?
Submission is to yield to the authority of another; to surrender to defer to the judgment or the discretion of another; to comply with; to be subject to (Webster’s Dictionary).
Submission is to yield the option of leading in order to follow. Any person can exercise their option of leading in any given situation. Submission is yielding that option of leading to another and choosing to follow for the sake of order and/or unity. In a marriage, both husband and wife are capable of leading, but for both to lead simultaneously would mean chaos and confusion. Thus, someone must give up their option of leading.
Submission is also the ability to bring out the best in others by yielding to their commands, opinions, or suggestions (1 Peter 3:1-6). As a wife submits to the leadership of her husband, she enters into her God-ordained role in the relationship. In doing so, she releases the grace of God in her husband'’ life for him to become the best man, husband, and father he can possibly be (1 Peter 3:1, 7).
What is the purpose of submission? Submission demonstrates God’s own nature and being to the world. Scripture makes it very clear to us God is a God of order (1 Corinthians 14:33, 40). Submission ensures a successful home.
A husband and a wife must understand and practice the concept of submission in God’s order for the home. For each partner to take their divinely appointed role is to produce an order and a stability contributing to a smooth running home. Failing to implement God’s order for submission in the home creates a disorder cancelling out much good in the home. This failure will eventually destroy the home’s effectiveness in the world, in the church, and in the lives of the family members. Submission teaches God-ordained roles to the children.
God has designed an order for the home by specifically naming the roles each member is to take. These roles constitute basically two kinds: leading and following. The Word of God specifically names who in the marriage takes which role (1 Corinthians 11:3). God in His sovereign wisdom even designed the very nature of the man and the very nature of the woman in accordance with this order (Genesis 3:16; 1 Timothy 2:9-15; 1 Peter 3: 1-7, Titus 2:5). As the husband takes the initiative and the responsibility that comes with the leadership role, and as the wife assumes the role of responder and follower, divine order is established. This divine order serves as a basic foundation for all of the relationships in the home. If these roles are confused or reversed by husband and wife, the children grow up with distorted concepts of what their roles in life are to be. This order requires a submission on the part of every member. Submission makes a home available for God’s blessing.
As the woman submits to her husband, and the husband submits to Christ, the will of God can be accomplished in the home. As the wife obeys, submits to, and reverences her husband, she takes her part in the structure of the home to set up the conditions for blessing, health, and fulfillment for all the other members of the home as well as for her. If a wife does not submit to her own husband, she takes herself out of divine order, and thus is not in a position to submit to God. In fact, she is not in submission to God. The only time a woman could rightfully violate this order, is if her husband required her to take an action diametrically opposite essential biblical truths. This kind of action should only be taken with serious prayer, thought, wisdom, and counsel. Even during these kinds of times, a wife must keep a submissive attitude all the while. For example, the Apostles did not obey the city rulers, yet they submitted to the consequences of their disobedience with a submissive attitude (Acts 16: 19-34).
What do we mean by real submission?
Real submission is genuine display of the earnest and humble response of the wife to the leadership of the husband that results in God’s blessing. A submissive lifestyle releases the grace of God in a greater way in to the husband and wife relationship. Furthermore, it sets up the creative potential for bringing family members into their highest level of spiritual and natural achievement. Real submission brings a greater amount of God’s grace into the husband-wife relationship!
Scripture tells us a husband and wife are joint heirs together of the grace (divine enablement) of God (1 Peter 3:7). As the wife submits to her husband, and the husband honors his wife, so the grace of God flows into the relationship to the extent of having prayers answered (1 Pet 3: 1-7). Since a relationship is the result of what two people mutually contribute to it, it is logical if either party fails to contribute spiritually the relationship suffers. When the wife is submitting to her husband, she introduces into her relationship with her husband the omnipotent grace of God. This is such a powerful, redemptive force God’s Word says by this indirect means she releases God to bring about the dramatic change in him (1 Peter 3: 1-6). What a tremendous privilege! This dynamic truth of submission challenges the husband to take his leadership role, makes it easier for him to do so, and establishes an important foundation for God’s dealings in her life and his. Her husband now has only God with whom to contend. He cannot use her lack of submission as an excuse not to submit to God. Facing God alone (1 Corinthians 11: 3), the husband is sure to change. Real submission produces the creative potential for bringing every family member into his or her highest level of spiritual and natural achievement.
Scripture tells us that God gives grace to the humble (James 4:6). It naturally follows that according to the degree of humility, so is the degree of grace granted. As the wife humbly submits herself to her husband in every area of their life together, she receives God'’ grace to be her best. When she is at her best emotionally, spiritually, mentally, physically, and socially she is then in a position truly to aid her husband and the children in being their best in natural and spiritual areas. There is no greater witness of God in the home, than a wife who is responsive to her husband, a positive encouragement to her children, and a selfless servant of others in the church and in the community.
What does real submission require?
Real submission requires faith! Submission on the part of the wife requires she recognize this route is God’s will even if it is contrary to her own feelings (1 Peter 3:5, 6). This does not mean a wife is responsible to share her opinion only when it agrees with her husband’s (Matthew 27:17-19). She must trust God will use her submission for good (Romans 8:28) even though it might mean her husband make a poor decision. This is all part of real submission.
Real submission requires humility. Scripture likens the relationship between Christ and the Church to the husband and wife relationship (Ephesians 5: 23-33). In this analogy, the role of Christ to the Church is seen in three distinct areas:
Christ is the Head of the Church;
Christ is the Savior of the Body; and
Christ is Lord of every believer.
These three aspects give us a view of how the wife is to view her husband. First, the wife must see her husband as her head ( Eph 5:23). She recognizes his authority and places herself under it. Second, the wife realizes her husband is to be her savior (Eph 5:23, 28, 29). He is to be her protector, deliverer, and preserver. By submitting to him, she allows him to take this role. Thirdly, the wife must see her husband as her lord (1 Peter 3:6). She does not see him as the LORD, but as an earthly representative of the Lord Jesus Christ.
Therefore, the wife can approach her husband with a great reverence and respect without hypocrisy and in sincerity even as Sarah of old. This inward heart-reflection of “esteem, of placing up on a high place, and of godly reverence” will go a long way towards making him the man God wants him to be. He, at the outset of marriage, might be a rather poor earthly representative of Jesus Christ, but a submission to will goes much further in bringing about growth and change than nagging, harassment, and constant criticism. It is only as she places him in this position he will achieve God’s best in his role in the home. Sarah suffered from some of Abraham’s blunders, but her attitude toward him eventually made him “the father of all who believe”. This humility, which is placing one’s self lower that others (Philippians 2:3-7), is an essential ingredient to real submission. It is this heart attitude that makes submission possible, especially under trying circumstances. The wife can count on God’s enabling strength to be able to do this (James 4: 6,7).
Real submission also requires sincerity. Some wives externally submit to their husbands only to get something out of them. This is a sinful attitude. A wife must submit internally and sincerely.
|
